Alright folks, so today I finally got around to registering for the El Paso Premier League soccer season. Figured I’d walk y’all through how it actually went down because man, their sign-up process is something else.
Starting The Hunt
First thing I did was search “El Paso Premier League registration” on my phone. Took me three tries ’cause I kept typing “Premiere” instead of “Premier”. Felt like an idiot. Finally found the legit page after scrolling past a bunch of sketchy third-party sites promising “discount registration”. Nah, not falling for that.
The Sign-Up Circus
Hit that bright red “REGISTER NOW” button expecting a simple form. Nope. First they wanted:
- My shoe size (seriously?)
- Emergency contact blood type
- Proof I’ve lived in El Paso over a year (sent ’em my HEB Plus card screenshot)
Photo upload part sucked. Kept rejecting my selfie for “low lighting” until I stood in my backyard at high noon sweating bullets. Finally accepted my squinty-faced picture looking like a hostage.
Payment Headaches
Credit card failed twice saying “address mismatch”. Turns out they wanted my billing address exactly how the bank has it – abbreviations and all. Changed “Avenue” to “Ave” and boom, went through. Saw that $185 league fee disappear real quick.
Final Confirmation Madness
Thought I was done after payment. Hah! Then came the liability waiver – 17 pages of legal jargon. Scrolled straight to the bottom like everyone does and scribbled my digital signature. Immediate regret when I saw they require notarization. Spent an hour hunting down a notary who didn’t charge $50.
Done… Mostly
Got the confirmation email with my player ID. But get this – now I need physical paperwork mailed? Ain’t 2024? Whatever. Printed everything at Staples while some kid yelled about Robux behind me. Dropped the envelope in a blue mailbox hoping it actually arrives.
So yeah, took me four hours total with all the hiccups. Pro tips: have every document imaginable ready, charge your phone ’cause you’ll be waiting forever, and pray to the soccer gods. See y’all on the field… assuming my paperwork doesn’t get lost in the mail.
